REVIEW & GIVEAWAY ~ Song of the Fireflies by J.A. Redmerski

Book title: Song of the Fireflies

Author: J.A. Redmerski

Series: Standalone (loosely connected to The Edge of Never series)

Release date: February 4, 2014

Since they were kids, Elias Kline and Brayelle Bates have been inseparable. When Bray moves to South Carolina, separating the two for the first time, they both at last realize that their innocent childhood friendship has developed into something much more. So when Bray finally returns to Georgia—and to Elias—things between them couldn’t be more perfect…until one fateful night changes everything.

Desperate not to go to prison for a terrible accident, Elias and Bray decide to run. As they try to make the most of their freedom, the two find themselves relying on a rebellious group of people who tempt the duo into a wild and daring new life. But they can’t run from their troubles forever.

As the consequences of their past catch up to them, the couple must finally face reality. Even if they can make it through the unimaginable, Elias knows the truth about Bray’s painful history, and in the end he may not be able to save Bray from herself…

What a torturous and agonizing reading experience.

Song of the Fireflies is one of those books I'm scared to recommend because who knows what kind of emotional damage it'll do to you, but without reading it, you'd never experience the harrowing, tumultuous, but heartfelt journey that Bray and Elias went through. *blows out breath* How can a book be so infuriatingly addicting BUT be a trainwreck at the same time? There is literally no comparison to other books I can make to give you a point of reference. At times, it certainly had that thrilling yet heartbreaking vibe like when I read Arsen by Mia Asher, but there's something else. Maybe because there was always an underlying sense of doom throughout the story? Or because these characters, particularly Bray, were so messed up and broken that desperate times called for desperate measures? I don't know. I still don't know and I've read the book!

This is also one of the few times I had a very strong visceral reaction to a book. I physically felt sickened by these characters but there were times I really wanted to jump in the book and give hugs all around. To me, this book deserves both 1 star and 5 stars so in order to reflect both sides I’ll be splitting my review into two parts: the definite 1 star and the reluctant 5 star.

The Definite 1 star: first 52%

Unfortunately, this part was mindblowingly bad. I had a moment there where I wondered if Ms. Redmerski did indeed write this book (I know!!!! *hangs head in shame*). The plot pacing was off, the characters were unbearable, and the book fell apart page after page. I felt like I was reading the book in 10 different languages and trying to decode it all. But more importantly, I picked up on a couple of things that completely derailed me from enjoying this portion of the book, no matter how emotionally evocative or addictive the writing: 

1. Only at the 10% mark and 17 years already passed. I was more concerned with the way the time gaps were portrayed and not necessarily against the "17 years."

Readers were left practically clueless about who exactly were Bray and Elias (only briefly mentioned in The Edge of Always) so going into the book, I hoped that the author would, you know, elaborate/set up the background so I'd know who exactly these characters were. And she did do that...for a while. Then suddenly, out of the blue, there'd be a time gap and it would be three months later. Then just when I'd get to a part where it's perfect for more character development or a place where I felt comfortable in really letting myself settle into the plot pace, BOOM! Another time gap and this time it'd be 4 years later. These kind of scenes just kept happening until 17 years have passed and both Bray and Elias are in their late twenties. This may work for you, but for me, I felt like I didn't get to know them well enough or at least, get a sense of their character before the author delved right into something entirely new. I just wished those parts were explained a bit more and the transition done a bit more tactfully. 

2. I felt so disconnected with the characters. Part of the reason is because of the untimely transitions that took away from the beauty of me understanding and the author explaining Bray and Elias's relationship. 

I'll be honest here and just tell you I did not feel a connection between the characters at all. From the brief glimpses of Bray throughout the years, she's portrayed as a rather clingy and bipolar person, and it was a real struggle for me to comprehend just how Elias could have fallen in love with such a woman. Perhaps it's because the two of them have always been together, first as friends and then to lovers? It felt too much of an insta-lust/insta-love kinda thing and I'll never know if it's not that case because the pacing of the book here didn't convince me of their bond.

3. There is something fundamentally wrong with Bray.

Even in some of the most gruesome dark reads I don’t get disgusted easily, but surprisingly enough, Bray sickened me. She’s like a cloud of poisonous miasma and whatever she clings onto, she.brings.DOWN. My emotions were torn between feeling heartbreak on Elias's behalf, feeling pure fury and anger in my veins because of Bray's selfish, immature actions and most of all, disappointment and sadness that her actions forced Elias into a place where he had no choice but to go along with her. 

4. The dreaded 52% mark.

 That was my extreme breaking point and HUGE WTF MOMENT out of all the WTF moments. The book was already nosediving its way down before then, but the culmination of events and then BAM this 52% mark put together was just enough for me. I had to DNF (did not finish) for a full hour and calm down before I could go back to reading. For Andrew and Camryn fans, I assure you that you'll feel agony, pain, and extreme and utter disbelief when you read this scene. I'm not a violent person, but never before have I wanted to bitch slap a female lead SO much. Bray pushed my buttons like no other heroine.

The Reluctant 5 stars: second half after 52%

This second half was just as B-A-N-A-N-A-S as the first half so why does it get 5 stars instead of 1 star? One, I finally could grasp a connection between the characters so what they did wouldn't feel robotic or clinical. Two, there was emotion (other than anger and fury) evoked. Three, the writing style was distinguishable as Redermski’s unique signature, not the aoifhoiawefhfksdfnsdfsdfk writing from part 1 that quite honestly needs some maturing. 

But most of all, she explained. The author went into detail about Bray and Elias’s psyche so I was more understanding of why Bray did the things she did and why Elias would always cover up for her. Surprisingly, I fell for Tate, the head leader of the group down in the beach scene where Andrew and Camryn make a cameo appearance. 

Though it was painful and harsh to read, this second half portrayed an evil side of love I found necessary to both the plot development and character growth. The moral of this story boils down to one sentence: How far are you willing to go for a loved one? And based off of Elias and Bray’s actions, very far. Of course, there were still a number of WTF moments that had me second-guessing my decision to continue reading, but because of how accurate the author portrayed these very real, very dark issues that plagued the characters, I feel compelled to give her 5 stars on this aspect. After all, the truth is ugly. 

The ending was a cheese fest, and that normally is a little bothersome but in this case, I don’t care. There were way too many negative emotions running high throughout the book so I found the happy, cheese ball moments remarkably refreshing. 

Would I recommend this book? I have no clue....read at your own risk. Do know, though, this book will provide a reading experience like no other. You may hate it, you may love it, but you'll never regret reading it. 

ARC provided by publisher via NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.

~Review by Feifei

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